polite sniper is polite, ooh sorry about that, moment of silence

Be Polite. Be Efficient.

(Have a Plan to Kill Everyone You Meet.)

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Mayfield 43: Left For Dead
talky sniper is feeling talky, ring ring ring, on the phone
haveaplan
[A: Phone call time, first, to the public.]

All roight. The important thing 'ere is t' not panic. If you want safety in numbers, go t' th' 'ospital. I'll be 'eaded there t' set up defenses.

If you want supplois, especially foirearms, you're welcome t' wotever you can foind at 1337 Benny Road.

If you're going t' troi t' stay 'ome, board up th' windows and doors, but leave cubby'oles t' see and shoot out 'f.

[B: All REDs and BLUs--yes, even the BLU Spy--get an additional phone call.]

You'd better still be aloive. If you need 'elp getting t' th' 'ospital, I can come boi and pick you up in th' truck. And there better not be any bickering--this isn't th' toime or th' place.

[C: The Sniper's loading up the Rape Van camper with all the supplies he can fit. He's also setting the guns and ammunition he's not taking out on the porch and in the living room. When he's done with that, he'll be boarding up the windows and otherwise setting up the house so that it can be quickly converted into a bunker if necessary.]

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(Miss Pauling's just helping him load up as well. She's made sure to grab food that's light and easy to carry, like bread and tinned stuff (she did not forget the tin can opener, so never fear). She also remembered to bring all the coffee in the house (she's going to assume the hospital has a kettle there).

Is there anything else I should get from the house Mr Mundy?

(She's got the revolver the RED Sniper gave her, as well as the knife Hiccup gave her as well.)

(He double checks what he's taken--he's pretty much stuffed the camper as full as it'll go. He figures that if he needs to pick up anybody, he can make room by leaving things with the people who decide to stay in their homes.)

Looks loike we're ready t' 'ead out. 'ave you been able t' contact 'f th' other REDs or BLUs?

[Spy runs to Sniper's house as soon as he hears his first word over the phone line and stops at the door, out of breath. He bangs on the door a few times.]

Sniper! I-- I told Pyro to go ahead to the hospital, I just needed to--

[His accent's scared out of him, apparently. He leans on the door and tries to catch his breath.]

Merde. J'ai trop se soucier de toi. Je ne sais pas la raison que je inquiète, tu es très compétent, je ne sais pas...

(Deadpan:) Nobody 'ere's a shambling monstrosity yet, Spoi, and I 'ave no intention of turning int' one. Is Pyro on foot or did she take your car?

(When Miss Pauling comes back out, he'll say to her:) Look loike Spoi's roiding with us. It'll be a bit 'f a squeeze, but I think all three 'f us can fit in th' front.

So, yeah. Kenpachi just woke up, and already had to bash some drone zombie heads in. He had grabbed a metal pole, and was just enjoying himself, fighting the zombies. He noticed the the Sniper loading the camper, and decided to ask about them. He really should meet his neighbors, anyway.]

Hey, you there? Any idea what's wrong with these people? 'Cause they just kind of started attacking. Pretty sure thats not normal.

No idea, mate.

Got any big furniture? We can use that as a barricade.

Big furniture...Yeah, I'll go get it.

[Yeah, he has no idea how hard it would be to drag a couch back down the street. He goes back towards his house to do it anyway...or grab a big chair. Either one works.]

'Course I'm alive! Geez, whatcha expectin', me ta get on the phone askin' fer brains? This is nothin', pally.

Good t' 'ear, Scout. See you at th' 'ospital, then.

'oo you got in your family? Still the same people as before?

Road Trip (Sniper -> Pauling -> Spy)

(The Sniper opens the door on the driver's side, extending his hand to Miss Pauling.)

C'mon, Miss Pauling, up you go.

(She takes his hand and gets in.)

Thanks Mr Mundy.

(She looks back at the neighborhood. For now, it's dead silent, like a ghost town. Not a soul in sight, and most houses boarded up. The eerie atmosphere sends a shiver down her spine.)

I hope everyone else will be alright...

[He takes a practice shot, just one, as they pass by some rotting people. Right in the forehead.]

Mon dieu, zhese zhings move slow. I wonder who could be stupid enough to be bitten.

Hey, Snipes! Heard y'were in this town too. Wish our reunion was happier, heh.

I'm still here but alls I got fer a weapon is a rolling pin.

No worries, I've got plenty 'f guns at moi place. I'll be sure t' pack a couple 'f shotguns for you.

You live alone, or you got non-drone folks where you are?

Only drones, but none of 'em have been outside and nothin's gotten in here yet.

I gotta give it a bit before I rush outta here, 'cause I'm lookin' out my window and there's a shitload of zombies wanderin' around the street. I mean, I can outrun 'em all, but I think it'd be smarter t'wait.

[Scout is not scared! Totally not scared.]

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